The 1980s will be remembered in infamy for several reasons. This decade was not only an era of dramatic social and economic change, but it was also infamous for its profound obsession with cocaine, AIDS, legwarmers, and most importantly, musical television. Since MTV first aired “Video Killed the Radio Star” in 1981, the channel’s popularity among our nation’s youth has skyrocketed, gradually evolving to promoting social activism and inspiring the young to follow their wildest dreams. This, of course, includes being MADE into a prom queen or a porn star, as no dream is too big here in America.

Since the ‘80s, the network has evolved to be completely unrecognizable from the one that previewed John Lennon and Madonna. As the decades have progressed, so have the trends. In a world where coke, big hair, and teen dramas about gingers “finding themselves” once thrived, new shows gradually emerged that focus on cats, currency, and kush. This phenomenon, which set in just after cocaine and right before Four Lokos, ignited new inspirations and ideas. Kind of like the American Revolution, but better. In between these two opposite ends, MTV has made some interesting decisions in order to keep up with our youth. In fact, it is these decisions that have made the United States what it is today.

For example, who would have ever thought it was a rational idea to have daughters allow their potential boyfriends to date their moms, so their mothers could get to know the boys that would be dating their daughters? Who could have imagined that such dates would involve picnics and mid-life crazed cougars licking whipped cream off of teenage boys’ chests? However, despite the wild success of these unconventional dating shows, it’s the psychologically disturbed room raiders, who kidnap innocent, young girls and store them in white tinted vans as they ransack their rooms while exploiting their underpants and “toys” to decide which ones they want to date, that are truly the driving force behind America’s success. Whoever said chivalry was dead was clearly mistaken. Our nation as a whole has been greatly inspired by these political figures. You can thank the “Jersey Shore” cast for stimulating our economy through three of our nation’s major industries: tanning salons, gyms, and coin-laundries. Thank all those sixteen-year-old pregnant girls for adding new members to our labor force and thank Tila Tequila for granting our nation not two, but three shots of love. Thank Rob and Big for abolishing slavery. But most of all, thank Andy Milanakis for rocking peas on his head. May his legacy live on.